At the end of a long life (I just turned 70) I have a chance to sit back and enjoy my pension and safety nets. How many mindless tasks have I done to make ends meet? What would my senescence be like without the ability to do nothing and be comfortable? As a baby boomer the promise of retirement was always held out to me. My grandfather made the most of his retirement. My father certainly did so. To say that I would enjoy mine more if I was still physically robust kind of misses the point. At least those women in the toll booths will probably have children to help them in their old age. Or will they? The Millinials are not very impressive yet, but as Peter Zeihan likes to point out, they are here. Not much of a Millinial population for a lot of countries. Mexican immigration to the US is largely done. The demographers can only point to Africa, a place where the cultures and societies are so primitive that modern medicine is still causing a population boom. Africa is expected to quadruple its population by 2100. I can't see how the continent could feed half that many people. Which suggests that emigration by the unskilled and unprepared will be a worldwide problem by the turn of the century. When things have been fairly stable for one's whole life, it is understandable to think such conditions will persist. But it looks to me like the change the world went through as it industrialized will be nothing compared to what is coming for the West. Old Chinese curses and all that.
Toxic and repetitive - sounds dreadful. I hope those young women found something better in their lives at some point. In the right setting repetitive tasks can be soothing- I am reminded of the old saying “ Before enlightenment chop wood and carry water; after enlightenment chop wood and carry water.“ in a repetitive task your mind is often free to think as you wish. There’s a freedom in that.
I’m reluctant to travel anymore. How are we so fortunate to have been birthed in USA - flawed and floundering as it is. My heart aches for those pink bedecked toll workers.
I had an encounter like this, but it ended differently.
A long time, when our youngest, who is now 27, was 3 and his siblings were 9 and 10, in home daycare could be found for $200/kid/month. As many parents know, day care isn't just expensive. It i a hassle. getting the kid up extra early to drop them off so we could get to our jobs on time. Then dealing with sickness, and other exceptions to the norm would regularly cause the "I handled it last time . No you didn't I did'". discussion.
I figured there had to be a better way.
I found a Au Pair matching web site, did some home work, and many interviews and eventually found a young Mexican gal (20 at the time) to live with us. She was a wonderful addition to the family.
It would appear that many families who take on Au Pairs expect some kind of domestic servant. We wanted her to look after our 3 year old while we were at work, and get the other two up early enough to get them onto the school bus. She became a part of our family. When our youngest went to Kinde garden readiness assessment he did his numbers and colors in Spanish which confused the proctors, and made me smile.
Her home town is Monetary. She had some college before she moved in with us. She continued college here in Minnesota. Her main goal in coming to America we to improve her English. In MX that can help you get a a better job.
As far as I could tell, she was very middle class for Mexico. She lives with her mother and brother, in a home they own. A very small yard, No grass. Broken glass bottles affixed atop the wall that separates their property from the sidewalk.
Our house, DEEP suburbs. We have a few acers, horses, lake shore.
We have visited her home 3 times over the years. In the beginning of our first visit I was embarrassed by the relative difference in means. Our lawn mower was worth more that their car.
She and her mom were eager to share everything they had. There was a 'meet the neighborhood friend" party Our Au Pair's friends wanted to make sure these gringos their friend was living with were OK people. They accepted me when they realized I could keep up with the tequila shots.
We visited many relatives and received warm welcomes. She took us on a couple different tours of Monterey. You probably know about the wildlife park in the mountains above Monterey.
What I eventually realized was that though we have greater material wealth, we were not their equal in relationship. They spent far more time with friend and relatives. We spent that time commuting and working. I started out being self-conscious of all the things we had. I returned home knowing I was missing something important in in our lives.
Thank you for this Ecuadorian vignette, beautifully observed. We can never really know what is going on in the head of another person, but I also often find myself wondering and imagining possible parallel lives. I lived in Cuernavaca, Mexico for a year in my teens and some of this imagery is reminiscent of that, particularly street performers at hawkers at traffic intersections.
I wrote a little piece about Shanghai from the perspective of a touring musician who can't speak any Chinese, if it's of interest.
This is true for all men-women combinations. Does a woman select a man of lower class or status than herself? No. Despite the crude truth of it, women mate-up, men mate-down. A woman has a very large investment in mating, a lifelong commitment. She's only going to open her legs for a mate of equal or better ranking than herself. She has to live with the consequences—a child—for the rest of her life. The man on the other hand can walk away, any time after mating, continue to spread his genes far and wide, or stay to form a family with the woman.
Women only choose a man of equal or better status than themselves. A man isn't going to find a woman substantially better than himself. This is what courtship is about; the woman deciding if this man is worth it, is this the best mate she can find. Is Taylor Swift going to marry the flunky roadie or the football star? What would you say if Taylor Swift was engaged to the wasted-stoner flunky-piano mover in her road show? How do you feel about that match? Who is Brad Pitt going to marry, Angelina Jolie or a makeup girl? That could go either way. Compare and Contrast these two matches: Brad Pitt & Makeup Girl vs Angelina Jolie & Roadie Dude?
At the end of a long life (I just turned 70) I have a chance to sit back and enjoy my pension and safety nets. How many mindless tasks have I done to make ends meet? What would my senescence be like without the ability to do nothing and be comfortable? As a baby boomer the promise of retirement was always held out to me. My grandfather made the most of his retirement. My father certainly did so. To say that I would enjoy mine more if I was still physically robust kind of misses the point. At least those women in the toll booths will probably have children to help them in their old age. Or will they? The Millinials are not very impressive yet, but as Peter Zeihan likes to point out, they are here. Not much of a Millinial population for a lot of countries. Mexican immigration to the US is largely done. The demographers can only point to Africa, a place where the cultures and societies are so primitive that modern medicine is still causing a population boom. Africa is expected to quadruple its population by 2100. I can't see how the continent could feed half that many people. Which suggests that emigration by the unskilled and unprepared will be a worldwide problem by the turn of the century. When things have been fairly stable for one's whole life, it is understandable to think such conditions will persist. But it looks to me like the change the world went through as it industrialized will be nothing compared to what is coming for the West. Old Chinese curses and all that.
Toxic and repetitive - sounds dreadful. I hope those young women found something better in their lives at some point. In the right setting repetitive tasks can be soothing- I am reminded of the old saying “ Before enlightenment chop wood and carry water; after enlightenment chop wood and carry water.“ in a repetitive task your mind is often free to think as you wish. There’s a freedom in that.
I’m reluctant to travel anymore. How are we so fortunate to have been birthed in USA - flawed and floundering as it is. My heart aches for those pink bedecked toll workers.
I had an encounter like this, but it ended differently.
A long time, when our youngest, who is now 27, was 3 and his siblings were 9 and 10, in home daycare could be found for $200/kid/month. As many parents know, day care isn't just expensive. It i a hassle. getting the kid up extra early to drop them off so we could get to our jobs on time. Then dealing with sickness, and other exceptions to the norm would regularly cause the "I handled it last time . No you didn't I did'". discussion.
I figured there had to be a better way.
I found a Au Pair matching web site, did some home work, and many interviews and eventually found a young Mexican gal (20 at the time) to live with us. She was a wonderful addition to the family.
It would appear that many families who take on Au Pairs expect some kind of domestic servant. We wanted her to look after our 3 year old while we were at work, and get the other two up early enough to get them onto the school bus. She became a part of our family. When our youngest went to Kinde garden readiness assessment he did his numbers and colors in Spanish which confused the proctors, and made me smile.
Her home town is Monetary. She had some college before she moved in with us. She continued college here in Minnesota. Her main goal in coming to America we to improve her English. In MX that can help you get a a better job.
As far as I could tell, she was very middle class for Mexico. She lives with her mother and brother, in a home they own. A very small yard, No grass. Broken glass bottles affixed atop the wall that separates their property from the sidewalk.
Our house, DEEP suburbs. We have a few acers, horses, lake shore.
We have visited her home 3 times over the years. In the beginning of our first visit I was embarrassed by the relative difference in means. Our lawn mower was worth more that their car.
She and her mom were eager to share everything they had. There was a 'meet the neighborhood friend" party Our Au Pair's friends wanted to make sure these gringos their friend was living with were OK people. They accepted me when they realized I could keep up with the tequila shots.
We visited many relatives and received warm welcomes. She took us on a couple different tours of Monterey. You probably know about the wildlife park in the mountains above Monterey.
What I eventually realized was that though we have greater material wealth, we were not their equal in relationship. They spent far more time with friend and relatives. We spent that time commuting and working. I started out being self-conscious of all the things we had. I returned home knowing I was missing something important in in our lives.
Just who is the wealthy family?
Thank you for this Ecuadorian vignette, beautifully observed. We can never really know what is going on in the head of another person, but I also often find myself wondering and imagining possible parallel lives. I lived in Cuernavaca, Mexico for a year in my teens and some of this imagery is reminiscent of that, particularly street performers at hawkers at traffic intersections.
I wrote a little piece about Shanghai from the perspective of a touring musician who can't speak any Chinese, if it's of interest.
https://open.substack.com/pub/2devils/p/red-lobster?r=ga5di&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web&showWelcomeOnShare=true
Mating strategies:
This is true for all men-women combinations. Does a woman select a man of lower class or status than herself? No. Despite the crude truth of it, women mate-up, men mate-down. A woman has a very large investment in mating, a lifelong commitment. She's only going to open her legs for a mate of equal or better ranking than herself. She has to live with the consequences—a child—for the rest of her life. The man on the other hand can walk away, any time after mating, continue to spread his genes far and wide, or stay to form a family with the woman.
Women only choose a man of equal or better status than themselves. A man isn't going to find a woman substantially better than himself. This is what courtship is about; the woman deciding if this man is worth it, is this the best mate she can find. Is Taylor Swift going to marry the flunky roadie or the football star? What would you say if Taylor Swift was engaged to the wasted-stoner flunky-piano mover in her road show? How do you feel about that match? Who is Brad Pitt going to marry, Angelina Jolie or a makeup girl? That could go either way. Compare and Contrast these two matches: Brad Pitt & Makeup Girl vs Angelina Jolie & Roadie Dude?
Consider every war-bride brought home to the US.